leftist tiktoks that respect children's autonomy
go clean your room no it's not who's not listening go clean it a traditional parent would look at that and say wow way to teach that little boy to respect his father to respect authority figures but that's not respect that's compliance and they are not the same thing that little boy is downright afraid of his father and you can see it because of the countenance change on his face when he's talking to his mom he feels safe showing those vulnerable emotions but then the minute that Dad raises his voice and says hey he stops and he's like oh gosh now I've got to put on my mask and act like I'm okay I can't show these vulnerable emotions to Daddy that is utterly heartbreaking to me and if you understand all behavior is communication of a need you look at that that little boy and what he's saying in the beginning of that video it's gonna take forever my room is so dirty and you understand that he's saying I feel really stressed out and overwhelmed by this and I just need someone to come in and help me if we were to put this in an adult scenario and look at the times in our adult lives where we are trying to spin all the plates and handle all the tasks and we feel extremely overwhelmed by that if someone were to come in in a scenario like that and say to us oh it's not that overwhelming oh like just get over it like you just need to go do all your tasks that would not be helpful number two is somebody were to come in and say you better get all those tasks done or you're going to be in trouble then that too would not be super helpful in our motivation would be external not internal right what would be helpful in those scenarios is if someone were to come in and say man that that would feel really overwhelming what if we were to start just a little bit at a time can we break this down a little bit in this scenario with a little boy all he needed was someone to come in and say I can tell that you feel really overwhelmed by this and that's okay let's go break it down let's start with your books then we'll do your blocks then we'll do Legos and you break it down task by task and you are meeting the need of that child you're understanding them you're helping them feel seen and valued and you're not shutting them down emotionally psychologically or developmentally when fear is a regular tool used in parenting and it is a primary motivator to get a child to modify their behavior what winds up happening is these children grow up to be pre-teens teens and young adults Who hide things from their parents are more rebellious and so it's very likely that this little boy if this cycle continues he's going to grow up and get himself into a sticky situation where he really wants to call his parents because he wants their help but he doesn't trust them to help them especially Daddy he's afraid of what Daddy will do if he gets into a sticky situation it's not going to prevent him from getting into those situations it's probably going to make him be really silent about it and to hide it really really well and the reason we know this is there's a lot of us grown adults who did this very same thing because we had parents who parented like this that is the worst deadlift form I have ever seen in my entire life he is going to seriously injure himself and he should do better at the deadlifts he should get a trainer or something really figure that one out maybe also talk to someone about being associated to other people on the other hand we got schools up the road that have litter boxes in the bathroom for the cats for all you people out there that think she's kidding she's not schools now are literally putting litter boxes in elementary kids bathrooms for those elementary school kids that identify as cats and dogs she's absolutely she's absolutely sorry she's absolutely right it's a serious problem they even installed an aquarium at my local elementary school for the kids that identify is dolphins girl be [ __ ] for real y'all need to get off Facebook hello I [ __ ] can't stand liberals I can't I made a thread on Twitter yesterday saying that Biden basically throwing up his hands with kovid um is gonna make disabled people not vote we are still averaging 500 people a day dying of covid it has been the leading cause of death for several disabilities and now you mean to tell me you want to disabled we would go to groups of unmasked people to go vote risk their lives to go vote for somebody that left them to die meanwhile all these Republican bills talk about election security make it harder for disabled people to vote doing away with certain Provisions that are for disabled people to vote so you don't know what the response from liberals was you're a trump supporter still expect people to mask you feckless Craven Jack asses you want disabled people to risk everything to vote and you don't give a [ __ ] you keep talking about voting as harm reduction but if I'm risking my life to go vote is that harm reduction no masking deters disabled voters and you know what every marginalization leads to disability barbecue time the alt-right pipeline doesn't exist the left indoctrinates just as much as the right not not at all the left is [ __ ] terrible at indoctrination I wish we had right wing numbers it is so easy to disguise reactionary politics and multimedia fan-based communities it is actually insane to join the left you need to read books keep up with public policy and admit that your placement within a privileged group means that you contribute towards the oppression of other groups and that you need to spend the rest of your life on learning and combating the biases you developed to join the right you need to spend too much time on Xbox voice chat and have no one around to tell you that you're being a bigot even if there was someone around to tell you that you're being a bigot you could just disagree with them [ __ ] you don't even need to keep up with public policy most right-wingers don't have the attention span being right wing doesn't require any critical thinking or effort you literally don't need to change a thing you just go off of common sense in confirmation bias it's literally so [ __ ] easy by comparison I want to eat that you really can't make this [ __ ] up this is an example of how stupid our discourse has become because of all of the Red Scare and anti-communist sentiments of the late 20th century this is Forbes Magazine literally suggesting socialism as a potential Savior for capitalism this is literally socialism no I mean like this headline that is the literal definition of socialism because it's a good idea it's a good system it's a good way to organize society and you know what people agree with it as long as you don't call it socialism hmm today over 60 people testified against an Ohio Board of Education policy that would ban trans students from bathrooms ban the use of their pronouns and out them to their parents but today I want to highlight the testimony of a one person in particular a teacher by the name of dawn Riggs who I am 100 certain saved students lives listen to her good morning good morning my name is Don Riggs I'm from Logan Ohio and I am an educator in my 33rd year of teaching I'm here to oppose the harmful resolution presented by membership I am certified in theater and in science so my experience on this issue is multifaceted as a teacher I've had the privilege of working with many lgbtq plus students in my career specific to transgender youth I have many trans and non-binary students in my classes my experience with transgender individuals spends my entire career I am still in touch with some of those folks every single former student has told me how much knowing they had a safe place to be their authentic selves has meant to them they have shared stories about traumas they were experiencing outside my classroom from classmates other teachers family members they have told me about their cutting they have told me about their Suicidal Thoughts their depression and anxiety and wish to disappear the fact that they could walk into my classroom be called the name they chose and be called by the pronouns that reflected their lived experience made a difference even if no other adult in their life infervent affirmed their identity they knew they would be safe for at least a little while each day 33 years of teaching how many students is that I will never know how many transgender students have felt safe and protected in my classroom but I am proud to say that they were it is no burden to use a name that we are asked to use it is no burden to use the pronouns they're shared with us if your friend William asked you to call him Billy you don't blink and I if your friend Elizabeth says I go by Lily you call her Lily and we just say okay the only difference between these examples and those opposed by this harmful resolution is the perception that a student's gender does not fit your expectation of it the Damage Done by that policy is Unthinkable and I will not discriminate against my students and this board of education must not either the language in this proposal that teachers must out their transgender 30 seconds not ready to be out is horrifying our students must be able to choose the time and the manner in which they share their trans transness and with whom it is not our place to force them to do so I urge you to oppose this hateful and misguided rhetoric thank you that was one of the most powerful testimonies that I've ever heard on this issue I guarantee you that she saved her students lives and I hope that every lgbtq student in their life gets to have a teacher like Don Riggs and has Fierce an advocate as she was thank you have you ever reacted badly to something and realized you were reacting badly while you were doing it because that was me this morning I'm not a morning person on the best days and today was not a best day I didn't sleep well last night and while we weren't running late for school yet if we didn't move fast we would be and I was stressed I told this kiddo my school yesterday wasn't feeling well so I was writing her an excuse and she's like why are you doing that do I really have to bring it to school wow what a simple question I snapped at I was like because the school requires it why do you question everything as those words came out of my mouth I'm thinking to myself why am I saying this I don't feel this way I teach you to question everything so I just kept going with the same tone but switch directions what was really like why do you question everything I love that about you keep doing it I just have a bad attitude sometimes I'm sorry at which point she laughed at me and said it's okay rest of our morning went smoothly we made it to school on time moral of the stories that we're not always going to get it right but we can always try to fix it all alone has deported nearly as many Haitians in his first year as the last three presidents combined the y'all remember this photo right here y'all remember how sensationalized and circulated this photo was yeah the photo of the Haitian migrants being whipped at the Texas border during the Trump Administration y'all remember this photo right sprinkle some more contacts right so when we point out the fact that body has expelled nearly as many Haitians in 12 months as they were deported in the previous 20 years under three different presidents what that mean it shows that both parties are implicated in anti-blackness and using our people as fungible objects for self-serving political gains and the purpose of this post is to facilitate accountability Trump supporters lack a lot of things along with accountability for the person they voted for it's starting to seem like body supporters also have the same type of stake to them in closing both Biden and Trump used the argument of National Security to justify doing things like this to the Haitian people education is so I just want to say that I love Tariq aka the little boy known as corn kid he is adorable his discussion of corn is just so innocent and pure and there's so many life lessons that you can take from it so this is no shade on him at all whatsoever at the same time I really struggle with black viral Fame I don't want to be one of those people that keeps people from enjoying things because I'm looking at it way too deep but part of me wonders if whenever black people go viral for something if we are all sharing it and laughing about it for the same reasons and if I'm honest I don't think that we're finding the same thing humorous especially along racial and cultural lines and I know that people will jump in the comments about corn kid and be like Oh but he's so cute and this and that and the other and that's totally true but I can't help but wonder if white people's impulse to be entertained by black people is behind the virality of born kid or for that matter the period uh period girl who is Black fishing just some food for thought you can absolutely make jokes about trans people you just shouldn't make them the butt of it anyway unrelated I've been reading this book called unmasking autism and if you haven't read it and you think you have it oh boy you should here on page 58 something blew my mind I shall read it for you there's a term for autistic trans people who see their neurotype and gender identity as inextricably linked and I I don't know how to pronounce it but it's like a-u-t-i gender like Audi gender probably now I'm a non-binary person and I've always really struggled with this weird sort of dichotomy or wherever I'm alone I just don't really have a concept of gender it's not something that like plays into my day-to-day and I was like well maybe I'm agender and then but when I'm in a social setting I feel like a man and then I realized of course I do all of my masks are male masking is the way autistic people pretend to be neurotypical allistic so they can blend in with everybody around them and the performative masculinity that neurotypicals do is also something that was imparted on me so in order to blend in I learned how to be a man and then whenever I put the mask back on I'm like is what a man feels like oh I'm angry and I don't want to talk about it ew I'm going to war so I have an excuse to hug my man friends I don't know why it's vaguely Southern and if it bothers you that the highlighter colors are just all over the place uh they have no corresponding color meaning I just like to make the books queer this has been a mind-blowing revelation this idea that uh my gender and my autism are linked and uh now that I've started to think about it in that way it makes so much more sense to me it also makes sense why Republicans want to ban books because I read just one over the weekend and now I've got trans autism see you can joke about it sometimes I buy the whole we want body diversity on our runways whole schtick that the fashion industry tries to sell it sell us but other times like today I don't I spent today looking over the ninsky dochka collection that they just presented like there's spring 23 ready to wear and there were tons of Great Looks like this one I'm obsessed super fun there are a lot of a lot of looks that I was like obsessed with um that I can't show you because they're a little scandy for Tick Tock but it's on my Instagram if you want to see it but that's not my point right now when all the looks look like this and this super skimpy super tiny lots of skin no modesty allowed okay then they go and put their only plus model of the entire show in this outfit that makes no sense with the collection totally covers her up completely her arms her entire body it just tells me that you just wanted to get the diversity points and move on and you don't actually care okay have you ever offered a homeless person food and had them turn it down that must mean that obviously they're choosing to be homeless right they probably deserve it for your consideration here are some reasons that an unhoused person might say no to food when it's offered to they might have allergies and they don't know what's in the food or how it was prepared they might have celiac disease or another autoimmune disorder which means that they're on a special diet they may have tooth decay or other Dental issues that mean they can only bite into things that are soft and nothing hard or too crunchy they may live in an area where people are aggressive and violent towards homeless people both interpersonally and structurally and they may just not trust the food and that it doesn't have anything in it that's going to harm them they may be having mental health issues and just aren't in a space to accept something right now for example if they're experiencing psychosis you may just look kind of scary to them and they just don't want to interact obviously that's going to be a more rare reason but you see what I'm getting at and honestly the truth is that maybe they just don't like the food that you offer them people experiencing homelessness are still people they still have wants and needs and likes and dislikes they're so regularly dehuman demonized and stripped of any agency over their lives that sometimes just being able to say no is the only thing that gives them a sense of dignity in that moment the best thing that you can do for a homeless person is to just give them money could they buy drugs with it yeah sure maybe but that's their choice and it should be their choice sometimes people are in so much pain that the most important thing they need right at that moment is money to buy drugs because those are the only things that are going to get rid of the physical emotional and spiritual pain that they experience from being homeless they also might buy personal hygiene supplies or a phone call that's needed they might buy a train ticket to go visit their daughter I can't emphasize enough that people who don't have a home are still people with lives and needs and they should be given the benefit of the doubt that they are making the best decisions for their own circumstances and their own body and their own lives they should be treated with dignity and autonomy while we build a society where everybody is guaranteed home one final note if the original commenter is still watching this I commend you for offering that food and I'm sorry that it made you feel probably not great when they turned it down I hope it didn't make you not want to offer food to people in the future because there's a lot of people who would accept that gladly but I would challenge you and anybody else who's still feeling uncertain to think about whether maybe the idea that well that person's homeless because they made bad choices they probably want to be on the street you know they deserve it you know they should have worked harder these kind of things uh are ways of blocking the empathy Pathways in your brain because to actually feel the pain of this person is homeless and shouldn't be it's really hard and it sucks so I get the impulse to just want to close your brain off and your heart off and not think about it but consider what might happen if you made room for the idea that maybe this person made all of the best choices that they possibly could but social circumstances LED them to being there I could work at [ __ ] McDonald's and put a down payment on a house in your mid-20s in today's date that isn't hey man I think we're roughly around the same age I'm 26 I was born in 95. you look to be a millennial you looked at me right around my age so what I want to offer you guys you and other people who watch that video is that you have to understand that life isn't fair it's a game there's winners and there's losers no it is not life is not a game and I am so beyond sick and tired of every [ __ ] time somebody comes on here saying hey this isn't working we as a society need to change this and make it better some [ __ ] has to come in here oh well it's just the game Life's a game just you gotta play to win this is not a [ __ ] round of Mario Kart people not being able to feed their children sustainable meals people not being able to pay their rent on 60 hour work weeks the top one percent hoarding all of the wealth and not leaving anything else for the common folk that is not a game if that is a game all of our controllers are plugged into the [ __ ] drawer while these same people play the [ __ ] game on easy mode over and over again games are supposed to be fun there is nothing fun about struggling there's nothing fun about not knowing where your next rent check is going to come from and [ __ ] even if it were a game people get mad at games if I'm playing goddamn Mario Kart and I'm winning games and this and that and I have all the stars at the end and then some [ __ ] beats me because they get all the bonus Stars at the end yeah I'm gonna be [ __ ] pissed and in this video this guy goes on to say more stuff to the degree of flipping burgers is something anybody can do you shouldn't be surprised you're not well compensated for it how I do not give a [ __ ] if somebody is flipping burgers if somebody is scrubbing floors for a living I don't frankly give a [ __ ] if somebody is sucking dick behind a honey bucket if you are working 40 hours a week and you cannot afford to live in the city that you are working in something is wrong with the system not the individual and we have every right to [ __ ] say something in broad daylight it's large white creators hauling out racism and bigotry taking their Pages unsafe for white supremacists but that's not all I just want to make sure that you guys who are watching this stuff happen in real time know that this is not new This Is Not Unusual this is why the bipod Community is always saying that if you're not actively being anti-racist then you are cultivating a space for white supremacy this Creator is hilarious her content hilarious she's talented and imaginative and creative and she has cultivated a following here on this app because of those things the moment she made it clear that she was an anti-racist people started coming into her comments like this this is the kind of stuff that will start to happen when you start being anti-racist you are no longer creating a safe space for bigotry and hatred and I know it can be kind of scary to think of but do you actually want those kinds of people being comfortable in your space do you want them to feel welcome around you you were either an anti-racist or you're a racist if you stand in silence doing nothing then you've made your choice dearly beloved we are gathered here today to pay homage to all of the queers who got Harry Potter tattoos when they were younger may your childhood's rest in peace a middle school boys started what they called a pedo database to track the behavior of one of their creepy teachers towards the girls in their class the teacher had said that he had weathered parents complaints for nearly 30 years 30 [ __ ] years and there was nothing anyone could do to him completely unsurprisingly none of the adults listened or took the students seriously when they went to them for help the boys tried to do the right thing and none of the adults listen so the boys got on Discord and started what they called their pedo database of every moment when the teacher was behaving in an inappropriate manner towards the girls that they could later use against him as evidence just in case things like him telling girls to get up and dance for him and telling them to arrive in bathing suits tomorrow calling them sweetheart and sunshine and telling one girl to take off her shoes and wiggle her toes for him they did this for over a year and then in April 2022 the teacher was escorted out of school under investigation for stalking a pre-teen girl and just tip it's not a big deal just a couple dollars give the nice Barista who made you your drink a tip Eat the Rich Jordan is trading her focaccia bread for a printer right now I am 100 serious when I say that this is the only way we will defeat capitalism when we can figure out ways to reliably acquire the resources that we need to live and the things that we want without involving money that's when we win if you get your hands stuck in a dog's mouth and you try to pull it out what do you think is going to happen the dog is going to bite down now what do you think would happen if you just went with it you know touch the back of that throat it's gonna let your hand go the same is true with my kids tantrums and big feelings the more I try to pull them out of their feelings the more they're gonna bite down and that's why I don't fix feelings I'm not shutting feelings down I'm not going to tell you to stop crying but guess what I also don't lead with a bunch of consoling either oh no I'm so sorry let's fix it what can I do I know that's what you little truly trolls think I do the majority of the time it's not most of the time I just go with it I stick my hand right down that emotions through which is just empathizing understanding not trying to fix it and I do that number one by staying calm number two empathy statements I get it boo I understand that makes sense I'm right here then I make empathy guesses is that making you sad are you feeling angry that must suck huh and then lastly I just reflect back the information they've given me you're mad because you can't go to the park I know I know that's it regulate my emotions empathize reflect that then once they've calmed down and I've calmed down we can problem solve together and if we continuously give them space to sit with their emotions we learn to sit with those emotions without reacting in the form of control or fixing and they learn to sit with those emotions without reacting in the form of a tantrum
2022-10-28 12:29
