I Hired A Speech Therapist To Fix My Boring Voice
Hey I'm Kane I have a super, monotone, voice it might not come off that way in some videos because, I edit, out. Of, all, the pauses, and gaps I never, thought that it could be improved this month I am going to speak to a speech, therapist, to, fix my boring, voice in, the past I've lost, 40 pounds I've, gotten. A hair transplant, and this is the, most life-changing video. I've ever made up Buzzbee tan you will see why one of my biggest insecurities, that I don't, talk about and very nervous because what if I can't, change with, all that said let's jump into it. Let's. Go meet our speech therapist my name is Amy I work, on people who want to improve their speech singing, to acting to, presenting. It's not about the speed you don't need to speak fast if you stop. And. You think exactly what you want to say your point can come across much more point I noticed, a. Lot we talked about what's called the power bottles which is right here you lecie politicians, doing this you want them flailing, all the way because then your ideas, are flailing but, if you have it right here, what you need to do is really, try this is your, exclamation point what other, things, do you think I could improve. On potentially. Potentially. And you've left it right there I didn't, know if you were done with your sentence, or not versus, if you would have said so, what other things would you like me to work on I would have gotten the clue like now it's my turn to talk so especially for an interviewer, another, thing let's work on yeah I contact, because you keep looking up at my flashy light, and, it makes me want to be like what's up that is something is something they are is very vulnerable for, both of us, but vulnerability. Is what makes for good content, good conversation. Good dialogue, I'm really nervous because at the very end of the month I'm giving a speech in front of, over 500. Universities students. I really. Want to dig deep and apply, everything I'll learn to give the most inspiring, and on a speech I've ever given one. Of the things I did is go out and talk to co-workers. That I have asked, him what they first thought of me when they first met me, times that I met you yeah I thought you didn't like me because your voice before I got to know you I was afraid of you because I always thought you were angry since. Your Mountain I don't know what you're feeling like are you mad are, you frustrated are, you happy, you're so busy and in so short the combination, of that makes it sound like people are bothered you've, known me the longest so we're sitting next to each other as antarians well I didn't think he likes me very much when I first met you you were always very helpful but, you just seemed uninterested did, you ever think I didn't like.
The. Lack of interest, I wasn't sure if you liked me or not because, I. Thought, we were friends from the beginning, friends. From the beginning. Now. I'm realizing a lot of stuff about my life that I did not know at what point did you know that that's just my, personality versus, like that I don't like you. Oh. Yeah, were. We friends then. I'm. So. Stressed. I. Knew you were nice when you were sitting, up the stages, by yourself and I stopped oh. I. Knew it look so nice just like get that in a fire do I have. To. Hear that it took Ryan, nine months. To know that I didn't, hate him sucked. I just think about all the potential, friends, that I could, have made through, the years I did, not expect, to get. Emotional. About it my, perception, of the world is, a lot, different. Than how. It actually is, like, I didn't know so many people in my life felt the exact same way, I. Don't. Even know how to process, this I love trying to fix things improving. Myself and growing as a person, every chance I get working. Out getting fix, miling. More getting like pre-diabetes, in check getting a hair transplant getting, a personal assistant like all this, stuff, and, one of the biggest issues that I had only, now am I making a video about it I'm gonna attack this like a, ninja by the end, of this this, is not going to be how I'm gonna be talking, I. Need. A break myself down to build myself up from the bottom up when you're excited, it's like from here to here other people even sometimes, will be like it's communicated, that I'm a gay you, even, if someone says something to you that's wild, or like uncalled for he'll, just be like a. Lot. Of the expressive. As you get. When. You're doing a comment or, a statement, where, you want to sound confident, your voice needs to go down my, name is Amy, I like. How. They come I, like. The. Moment, or syllable, right before the very end you're on high low I like Dom I do want to learn to garden, because, I think that's a really good skill, great. Don't drag. Out the, last words either you just take your finger touch. Your thighs I started singing video in college that's, it. Okay. And I will go to dinner or something oh my, god that was so good, Kangol be like it was pretty good. You. Always say stuff is pretty good when it's excellent what is it gonna take for you to be, mean. I. Really. Need to watch my car because, it's really, dirty. Nana. Nana, Nana, Nana, Nana Nana Nana. Nana Nana. No words I really, need to watch my car because it's so dirt so when I took your words out you. Use every, other part, of language, to. Get your point, across. Yeah every parts of language our intonation, our. Stress. How. Am i with compliment, it still just very dry I said your make it look good today yeah yeah your makeup I. Mean but I'm extra, so, I want you to be like come on face. Okay lipstick, that's how you give compliment. Is. The thing in, my mind that's why I'm taking it. Seriously. Yeah, oh. Really. Like how the way cuff pulls. Up on your shirt, that's. So different I've never seen that. But. That is different and I was authentic, about that I've never seen a shirt that came like that thank, you but I wouldn't want to see and that. Was your compliment, and you felt it from me. You've. Given me several gifts, through the years I gave you a Polaroid, well doesn't think I think you genuinely, did enjoy the kit I did Brady's a good gift giver I, think, what you said was like I've always wanted one because. I know that that's not you are I know that you did like it I agree to that happy. Birthday, thank, you. You're. Finding the one piece of truth in whatever it is that you wanted to compliment Wow. Yeah. Thanks. So much yeah literally, every, single session with Amy I have a new revelation it's, mind blowing week, to lots, of stuff is being thrown at me I know you went on vacation so. I would ask oh so like where are you going, Haeju. Really. Oh cool like are you going with friends, yeah some Kotchman really. Whoa. Finding the genuine interest in someone else that's the thing that, is going to spark more conversation. So tell me. That's, already, something that I'm interested about we're. Gonna talk about getting, what you want this, is one thing that I know I'm, bad at I feel like I asked for help but I don't know how to do. That in a, sweet. And Deering way think about why, a waiter, is so, friendly, because they want it when you want something, the complimenting. Of the ability, that you were trying to get the help with and love to your work that you did on, last.
Week's Video I, would be so appreciative, if you could do it to get from line that can be asking, their advice you, know so much about this, I don't. Know anything, about this is there any way you would be willing to tell me and really value, your opinion, you make very hot minute emotion. I. Almost when they're like it'd be interesting if people watched your work and then met you and like are you they imagined, or. Something as I was leaving her. Next clients, recognized me. I literally, was like yeah. I am, nice. To meet you I waved and I ran. That. I don't, like them you. Know. They, take the same amount of time if you stop change. Directions, one introduce. Yourself, to, ask, their, name three, close, it out why, am. I so awkward. I've already been, more. Emotional. Than I have in, the past like, five years feeling. A. Lot. Of feelings, they don't know how to do likes you, are probably, one of the best, communicators. That I've met if not. Like. In. The past few weeks have, you noticed anything, different given. The amount of stress, that you're under getting, a lot of really amazing things out you've seemed very positive, grateful. For any time there's been a problem that you then need to go to a bunch of people to work around there's been like a real level of gratitude, and appreciation and. Lightness that I have seen ya. How. To talk to of somebody, who's helping, you out the three things to tell them number one this is the thing you, did do and I liked it, so it gives them that confidence, boost so they're going into it with a smile if I'm talking about your outfit, today I really. Like your outfit, I love how. That pink, hat brings, out your cheeks I mean and now, the, thing that I want you to change. I love, to see you in a blue hat let's. See what that does to your ass yeah because if I just came to you and said you, should try a blue hat things. Like oh my gosh gonna wear this hat I'm. So bad at building rapport and all aspects, of my life also, I inherently, don't think I'm that interesting, this is where I'm saying you don't have to live you're like five, myself so interesting, you, could be self-deprecating I, don't know how to do that, tell me five, things that just aren't very awesome, about you I am horrible at communicating, I probably work. Too much I, have really oily skin, I have weak knees I'm like really. Messy, if you're in there oh you've got such a beautiful, home so, perfect to be a techie a total. Slob at all that makes people feel at, ease when, they realize, like oh you're not perfect either. What. Do therapist, ask how, do you feel so it's open-ended very, similar, to tell me about yourself, tell, me what's going on. Thank. You I think part of being, getting, in the closet, throughout, my life has prevented me from being. Able to be vulnerable you. Talking. About it how's it make you feel about it I think it makes me feel like, it's not, totally. Like. Would. Have been. Really. Eye-opening and. Life-changing. Your Epiphany today, who showed, your kiss money yeah, like. What do I do, also, no that's, finally, the reason why. It's. Huge. You said something so key in there you said maybe, it's not my fault. But. It's, not your fault and, that's, a big deal to take off some of the pressure and stress - it's something, about crying, and, opening.
Up And being able in a rule like they're all tied to my speech. Pattern, I did not know this, video was gonna turn into this like about, me coming, out like what. The this is crazy. Being in the closet for so long I just kept, trying to deflect, attention, for, myself I finally, know what I need the speech that I'm giving in two weeks needs to be about I'm a pretty private person so, opening up like this honestly is really scary but I know I got to do it. I'm. Directing a 30-minute, scripted video I have not directed, a scripted thing in two years I'm hoping that what Amy teaches, will, help me on set. To. Make sure the whole thing. And all of a sudden it will be so much easier to tell them what. You need to tell me I had a table read yesterday, the genuine, compliments. Openness, to hear their input I, think has really been, helpful have, you seen any changes. When you compliment like me and shame like I like to guys to death let's try it again in the middle of it you said Brian I like the pizza line said those are like, those and it was simple that was it. Okay. Small. Talk before and totally like 180, you a psycho. So that was a date in life and then I was like wow. If. I met you today I would think that he, likes me right on the bag I think you warmed up a lot, but you like smile more you think out loud a lot more than you used to do I feel like you're going down like the right path I think a way that you express, affection for, people is demonstrating, that you have faith in their skills or they like you respect what they can do like the way that you work with Kevin RDP. It's very clear that you think very highly of him and you're like partnering, with him honoring, people and respect is a big part of how you really, I, mean I definitely like that you noticed that the only reason I'm able to trust you guys to do it is because for Kevin like all the shots are, two to three times better than I imagined. Makes my job a lot easier too and same with you Brian like you care about the character and the lines and how it's coming off you're always like super fun, and chill to work with you. I've, definitely seen improvement, you're gonna be, like an actual conversation. Your. Speeches yeah you did I just, wrapped the very last day of my, scripted, video I love that they picked up on me, trusting, them in their creativity. I felt emotional. Like hearing that because that's. What I wanted, out of this process the, fact that they said yes to, joining, me on this journey ultimately. Does show that they do want, to work with. Me now that that's down I'm gonna switch my focus, to, prep, for my speech, holy. I. Am. Still writing my script right, now the most important thing is structuring the speech have something important to say before you. Can sound good saying it so all italicize, where the. Emotion, is going to be when I talk I do this like leaning, back and forth thing is there anything I can do to not either put the weight on one foot and barely, have your other toe there and get a highlighter, and just highlight, the parts that are fun your cadence. Is up you're not, monotone, at all I'm happy with the speech I am exposing, myself, a hundred percent I've mentioned, stuff that I have, not, even talked, to my close friends about I'm, nervous but I think this is what, I have to do like this whole speech and, this whole experience.
In This video is about opening, up and not, being afraid to be vulnerable. Hey. Boston University, I am Caine and I will be on your campus tomorrow at 6:30 p.m.. Along, with a few other Asian American guests I'll be sharing a lot of intimate, stories that I've never ever shared before and they'll, be a Q&A after an amine green and I'll see you there coming up so, I am in my hotel room in Boston. The city is so cool I just want to feel, as, comfortable as, I can with the words so, they have impact, I hope I don't choke what if I choke thing I hope that, the, students get something, out of it see y'all tomorrow. Let's. Give a warm welcome to can't give I. Want. To start off by apologizing. To. All the people that I spoken, to in the past in auditoriums. Just, like this I wasn't. Being, honest with them I used to teach finding. Your voice as, if once you find it you're, done but the truth is I'm still. Finding mine at. Six, years old bright-eyed, and bushy-tailed, my parents and I were invited to. Go to my, teachers classroom after hours as we sat in that colorful, classroom, in the miniature wooden, chairs my. Teacher told my mom and my dad King, asked, too many questions, they. Wanted their kid to thrive, in this foreign school system and they looked me in the eye and said white. Momentum, play which. Translates, to canes, stop asking questions and so as a six-year-old kid, I quieted. My voice and hid, away my curiosity, be mean is, a Chinese, term, that, means to, save face and it. Describes the. Links an individual. Will go to in, order to preserve their established, position in society at, 19 years old after my freshman year of college I got my braces off finally, and, I. Was, a dancer, and I was feeling sexy, AF. And. I. Was ready I was ready, for my first kiss, but. Who, do I kiss I was. Nowhere near out of the closet, I couldn't, even say the word gay out loud and so I jumped. On Craigslist, I. Actually. Met the sweetest boy I'd ever met. Eventually. He. Asked, me to be his boyfriend. But. Remember, I had to be mean right, and I, told him no because. I didn't think that it would be possible, a week later I, mustered, enough courage, to ask him to be my boyfriend at, 19, years old I finally. Started, raising, my voice just a little bit and, started. To explore my curiosity, at, 23, years old one. Day I was sitting with my mom and she asked, me Caine, when are you gonna get a girlfriend and, instead, of nodding like I normally would and letting it go. Away I told her mom. I'm. Gay I don't. Want a girlfriend I already, have a boyfriend. And. She. Didn't take it well the. Thing that hurt me the most was she said came. Don't tell your father don't. Tell anyone keep, it inside, and. For. The first time in my life I saw. That my mom was embarrassed, by me. Instead. Of saving face I let mine show and it, wasn't a face that, she recognized, as her son a month. Ago I read a comment and it wasn't the first time why is Kane so monotone, and, that triggered, a deep-seated. Insecurity. That I wasn't engaging, enough when I spoke and so I did what any other good BuzzFeed er would do I decided. To make a video and. It. Would be titled I hired, a speech therapist, to fix my boring, voice she, had me sit down with, a bunch of people and asked, them what did you first think of me when we first met to. My utter shock, and horror. Every, single person, thought that I didn't, like them when, we first met one of my Coker's, thought I didn't like him for nine months. That's. The time it takes for a human, to be formed. My. Best friend Freddie she said that she also thought I'd him like her for months and by, at that point I thought we were besties. My. Old voice was direct it was Stern it made people believe that I wasn't playful, or that I was too busy to be bothered I had to face the fact that. People thought I was the Grinch who stole Christmas, when. I thought I was Cindy Lou. One. Particular day in one, of my sessions with Amy I had an epiphany one. That would change everything. Going. Into this month-long experience, I thought that my lack of communication. Skills was. Because of my cultural background or that English was my second language I never, considered, the fact that being, in the closet for. So long and hiding. So much of myself that, I accidentally. Hid away part. Of my personality, and only, now sixteen, years down the line am I, starting to uncover, it I'm, sorry that I used to think identity, and voice were, outward, check boxes it's every, single building, block every, encounter, that we've had every, bully everyone. That's told us to shut up and sit down every. Crush or heartbreak, we've ever felt every. Misunderstanding. And attempts. To fix it every time we face our fears and all, the times we run away from it every compliment that we've given and received every. Truth and lie, we've ever told and every. Time, we apologize, please. Don't. Let others quiet your voice and always, remember, to embrace, your curiosity, and if we need to show our face instead, of saving it it might be the only way, for us to honestly grow, thank.